3/08/2011
2:43AM - Nightmare
That haunting dream of being cooed to sleep by death. His hand gently stroking the back of your hair as your attempts to call out are muffled by the steadily increasing warmth and blankness. The feeble attempts to call out are soon replaced by a pressing desire to wake up in reality. How much of this is a dream. What if death really is stroking my hair and coaxing me away from life through the disguise of a dream? After the fight is won, the thoughts and the fear of the dream remains like a residue on my mind. And the hair on the back of my head feels unnaturally smoothed. I hear the stairs creak. My curtains ruffle without the sound of much wind being present outside. I sit shaken. The peripheries of my vision narrow, sleep beckons me still. Despite the adrenaline its urging me back. But I know if I return this quickly the scenario will repeat, the narrative will play out again. And who's to say I'll be the victor of round two...? So I sit and busy myself. And say aloud to my sleeping family I love them, in spite of their inability to hear me. Then I write this down and it comes across a paranoid musing. How manic. This feeling, this fear. It stems from somewhere. It was started by something. Doesn't it? Wasn't it? I feel irrational and disturbed, but I haven't written so freely in months. Don't let this malevolent night be something final...
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4 comments:
No edits. No pauses. Written flat out. Clumsy but I like it.
Don't watch Scream 4 again.
Jimzip :D
Heheh I joke. Yeah it feels raw, but cool, those moments when you are really feeling something are really tough to jot down because you have to tear yourself away from the feelings for a moment and do something that's usually a 'calm time' action.
I find it really hard to record dreams when I wake up because I think to myself 'that would require waking up to write it down, and I'll remember it later anyway'. Bad call, I always forget hahah.
Anyway strange post, good to know you're still alive. ;)
Jimzip :D
Actually, and while we're on the topic. I sometimes have (and it's happened more than a few times now) these terrifying moments where I wake up but am still partially asleep. I remember one time in particular being in my uncle's apartment in Vancouver, and waking to see a gigantic black figure floating in front of me. Adrenaline surged and I actually began screaming out, but I couldn't open my mouth or move due to the sleep paralysis. It was a freaking disturbing moment, and when I finally began making sounds it was just quiet cries until I finally gained movement back and sat up, at which point the figure (of course) melted away and became the supporting beam between the two skylights of my bedroom.
Crazy nonetheless. Thought I'd share. ;) (Also written raw hehe).
Jimzip :D
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